It was a strange week. I began Monday uncertain about my direction and took a hike along one of the Bay Area’s most beautiful paths, the Lands End Trail, hoping for clarity.
Clarity didn’t come.
I did post a photo to Instagram with a brief note about feeling off, unsure, and not very good at life lately. It was meant as a simple check‑in — a “hi, I haven’t been posting much and here’s why.” I didn’t expect many replies, but received a warm, supportive flood of responses. This community truly is wonderful.
Then came the news about Kate Spade, a heartbreaking reminder that wealth and visibility don’t always protect someone from deep suffering. It underscored how complex and private these struggles can be.
That week also brought reminders of a different kind — a surge in blatant bigotry that left me dismayed. Posting recipes felt trivial against the backdrop of so much hurt and injustice.
And then, on Friday, I woke up to the news about Anthony Bourdain.
I’m still processing it. His voice — both the sound and his worldview — was unmistakable. He wore his feelings openly and didn’t hold back. Whether or not his explicit goal was to change the world, I truly believe he did. He widened perspectives, sparked curiosity, and connected people through food and stories.
He was one of my heroes, and his absence feels devastating. He won’t take us on journeys anymore, and he won’t continue calling out injustice with the same fierce conviction he brought to finding the best bowl of noodles. From the outside he seemed to have everything — success, family, a remarkable career — and his death is a stark reminder that mental illness spares no one.
We often urge people who are depressed to reach out to loved ones or hotlines, which is important and has undoubtedly saved lives. Yet many who suffer don’t know how to ask for help, can’t reach out, or are unable to find the right words. Please check on the people in your life — even those who appear strong, happy, or successful. This week has shown how deceptive appearances can be.
So what now? While I grieve the loss of Anthony Bourdain, I’m also trying to honor how fully he lived in his 61 years — seeing, tasting, and sharing more with the world than most people do in many lifetimes. I mourn his suffering, but I also believe he experienced and gave immense joy, opening eyes and softening fear of those who seem different. How many food or travel shows have done that?
As for me, I’m not exactly sure what comes next. But I intend to live more fully. I want to stop comparing myself to others — a habit I’ve carried too long — and to use my voice for things that matter. I’ve faced pushback when I’ve spoken up, and it only makes me more determined to speak louder.
This site and my social channels will remain primarily about food, but I can’t stay silent about issues that feel like a gut punch. When the world is hurting, I can’t focus on creating recipes and comfort food as if nothing else matters.
If you’re tempted to say, “Stick with food — I don’t come here for politics,” consider this quote from Anthony Bourdain, who encountered more cultures and circumstances than most of us ever will:
There’s nothing more political than food. Who eats? Who doesn’t? Why do people cook what they cook? It is always the end or a part of a long story, often a painful one. Look, I travel around the world asking people, ‘What makes you happy, what do you eat and what would you like your kids to eat ten years from now?’ and I get some really interesting and complicated answers in places like Beirut, Iran, Vietnam, and even Detroit.
– Anthony Bourdain
In his honor, I’ll speak my truth more often, admire my peers without comparison, move more, and use my voice to amplify those who need to be heard.
And of course I’ll continue creating recipes and encouraging you to cook and gather around the table with loved ones as often as possible. Take care of yourself. Take care of each other.
xoxo
Simone
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